I have been on this healing journey for at least 5 years now, and each time I bump into my old pattern thoughts and feelings, it never ceases to amaze me how hard it is to overcome the heavy energy that presents itself. I’ve actually just spent the best part of three weeks, once again facing my demons and healing more of what still needs healing. 

When I made the decision to fully heal my childhood trauma, as well as pain from past romantic relationships, I had no idea that the process would be so up and down. I had this romantic vision of linear progress, expecting more highs than lows, ups than downs. I can tell you, it is not like that at all. It is a journey of self discovery, where you are exposed to parts of you that you didn’t even know existed. 

The triggers can vary greatly as to what brings me back to ‘that’ place, and while at first I would resist being here, I now know that it is exactly where I am meant to be. This is healing, this is what it looks like. The resistance that I initially had, and that of course still surfaces at times, comes from a place of protection, of survival. It is in fact what kept me safe when I felt my most insecure and unsafe, and for that I am grateful. 

So how do we keep it all together in these moments when we feel like we are actually falling apart? The answer for me is mindfulness or mindful meditation. It is the idea of grounding & rooting yourself in the present moment, with the intention of remaining centered and focusing mainly on the breath. 

According to Thich Nhat Hanh, a zen Buddist monk, the art of weathering strong emotions lies in the ability to see our strong emotions as a storm, and to look at ourselves as a tree. The top of a tree during a storm always appears weak, breakable, while the trunk is always firm and stable. It is rooted. During our own inner storms, we should aim to move into our own trunk, (the area just below the naval), while moving away from the level of the head or heart, aka eye of the storm, where the branches are unstable. Visualising breathing into your sacral (roots or trunk), rather than staying stuck in your head and heart (branches) is our path to survival. 

Initially, it can feel really quite uncomfortable, especially given that for so many of us, it goes against everything we have ever known or been taught to do. To sit there, in stillness, on your own, with your thoughts, your feelings and trying not to let them consume you. To begin with this can feel really intense. Just 3 minutes of mindful meditation practice a day is all it takes to see initial change, however if you want to see long term change, the ideal is to increase your time in meditation practice and to be consistent. This is when you truly see the long term benefits including a greater sense of inner peace and alignment. 

With a bit of practice and dedication Yoga can help you to practice being in the moment and to root yourself more firmly. Remember that your branches will move with the wind all they want, but your roots will not allow you to be blown over, you will not be uprooted.